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Cutting Down on Oreos: The Subtle, Negative Impact of Persuasion in Coaching

10/11/2016

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PictureThese suckers add up (photo courtesy of Minato)
If you believe in the ICF approach to coaching, then you probably also agree that client empowerment is a top priority. Coaches may empower clients in many ways, including using a style of speech that is inviting rather than persuasive or directive. Invitation is inherently empowering because it makes no attempt to think or act for another person, and instead projects trust in another’s competence. Coaches who use invitation are consistently sending their clients the message, “You are in charge, and I trust you to find your own best awareness and answers.”

Persuasion, by contrast, is disempowering because it involves leading others to a belief, decision or action that is not of their design. If a coach persuades a client to take a course of action, even a helpful one, it’s hard to imagine that client feeling a greater sense of personal power as a result of that experience.



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Digging for Gems

10/11/2016

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Picture
Finding the most valuable nuggets requires more than persistence
As a mentor coach, I have the privilege of observing brilliant work from ICF student coaches. Some are tireless in prompting clients to identify a meaningful goal, others persistently explore their clients’ deeper motivations, and some perform both phases well. Although they may help people find a productive location to excavate—and to dig up large quantities of soil—they don’t always devote enough time to sifting through that pile to extract the most valuable gems.

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